Just Another Fish

As of next week I am working at the Insolvency Service in the city centre.

I have armed myself with another couple of pairs of work trousers, some ties and a great big coat, all cheaply obtained from Primark.

With that sorted out, I now have to make sure I don’t stay in a temping rut. (Although staying in ruts is something I am very good at.) I need to get on a PhD or maybe a graduate job.

I could really do with some chocolate right now.

I’ve handed two copies of my dissertation in for binding. Until I start a PhD — which *will* happen — I am no longer a student.

So now I really need to get a job. I’m not kidding, I am running out of money rather fast. Even if I start working tomorrow somehow I’ll have an extremely hard time surviving until I get paid. An agency told me last week they’d have something for me… well, today in fact. I now remember that agencies don’t give reliable guarantees or timescales….

Well, all I pretty much have to write now on my dissertation is a conclusion. (Oh, and a proof that seems to keep escaping me…)

I can’t think of anything to write - my dissertation isn’t a summary or comparison of anything….

I don’t pretend to be that good but I’m OK. I mostly play on Gameknot as ‘ht_random_rosy’, which allows you to take several days per move. What annoys me is players who, once it becomes apparent they’re going to lose, suddenly start taking ages to make their moves. Especially when you can set conditional moves and get the whole thing over with quicker. Especially when the games are part of a tournament….

Well, my dissertation is due to be finished by Friday and I seem to be very distractable right now. Why does it get harder to concentrate on something the less there is to do?

Tonight I reclaimed my official status of “most accident-prone person in the world.”

I got to taekwondo on a monday for the first time in ages, which brings back a bit of a nostalgia trip as it’s moved back to the Northern Tennis club on Palatine Rd, which we used to train in about a year back. The room is very nice and mirror bedecked, but absolutely tiny. There are some new faces there, quite a few of which are pretty girls. Can’t say I find this disagreeable.

Right at the end of the session, whilst we are doing some free-sparring, the strap on my head-guard comes lose. While trying to put it back on I block a kick with my left shin. I drop back on that leg with a grin which quickly turns to puzzlement as I realise it actually hurts quite a bit. What follows is probably the slowest collapse in the world ever as I begin to lose all feeling in my lower leg. I look at it and then drop to my knee, still not entirely grasping what’s going on. Two or 3 brief attempts to rise again fail, and I crumple quite amusingly to the floor (”Get up!” “Um… I can’t?”). I lie prone for about 30 seconds before getting helped up to a nearby wall. In this room all the walls are always nearby.

That was 40 minutes and a few sprays of Deep Freeze ago. Walking is still not high on my to-do list.

I do rather think I’m going to be buying a comfortable pair of shin pads in the near future.

Finally, at the age of 26 I have a filling. Two, in fact. The long wait can probably be attributed to not having been to a dentist for 8 years.

I was rather disconcerted immediately after they were put in, and I was wondering round Sainsbury’s, as fragments of the fillings kept coming out. This, apparently, is normal. (I popped back in to the dentists and checked.)

The dentist warned me not to have anything chewy or crunchy for lunch, so I had some houmous with carrot sticks and seedy toasted bread. Possibly a mistake. Am now assuming that slight pain where one of the fillings is is also normal.

Oh, and the taste of metal in my mouth is a little annoying…

EDIT: Have now looked at fillings in mirror. They’re absolutely massive! For what were apparently originally tiny holes in my teeth, is it really necessary to stick huge globs of what is, essentially, solder in them? As the operation was underway and my teeth were being drilled, I did think, “If those were small before, they certainly aren’t now….” I would have said as much to the rather pretty dentist, but I imagine a lot of witticisms meet their unvoiced doom at dentists.

… that I never had a blog before. At least I can give you my assurance I will never write poetry.

Pete and I saw this little film tonight at the UGC. Quite brutal, I rather liked it. Had a little discussion as to how much it is really based on real events, and whether I, personally, really would finish the bad guy off when I had the chance.

The main thing that struck me and (of course) interested Pete not in the least is what I believe to be a continuity goof: the film’s timeline is a few days encompassing a solar eclipse. We see a few shots, including one right after the eclipse, of a rather gibbous moon. This is impossible, right? During a solar eclipse the moon’s phase must be new - superlatively so. Orbital mechanics are such that the moon takes 14 days to go from new to full, and the shots of the moon we saw were at least 1/2 full, probably more so. That’s a minimum of 7 days gap at least. Someone tell me if I’m wrong here. (Also, why the hell would I notice something like that, given some of the rather harrowing events I’d just seen?)

So I’m a geeky pedant. So I want to know how everything works. I like that attitude, and if I wasn’t so lazy, forgetful and absent-minded it’s the sort of attitude that could (have) take(n) me places.

Tomorrow (or today if you believe the date-stamp) is sunday. Sundays are good for a reason: the roast. Other cultures have taken the piss out of us Rosbif’s for our prediliction for the traditional fare, but screw them. Roast dinner (with all the trimmings) is pretty much where it’s at. It rocks my world. I could go on at some length, perhaps write an ode, but I think you get the picture: I quite like it.

Oooh, I’ve written a fairly substantial blog entry. Should I be satisfied or concerned? I might start to fall under the impression that I have interesting things to say which people want to read. That would not be good.

Ah, what the hell. Let’s finish on a self-indulgent note. By this point, who’s still reading anyway?

What is the deal with mood-swings? I think most people associate me with my happy mode, which broadly speaking is akin to a puppy that can throw it’s own stick. Random, happy and mostly oblivious to the causal web governing the social interactions of real people. But with the happy side comes the flip: withdrawal. Hmm… how does an admittedly already oblivious person withdraw more? I suppose the energy to be social, however much a stab in the dark it already is, goes away. From an extroverted introvert to just plain introvert? And why does depression absolutely kill libido? It’s a sign I’m feeling good if I can’t stop looking at the expression on a pretty girl’s face. But anyway, the annoying thing is the cyclical nature of all this. If I’m happy, then soonish I shall be withdrawn. If I’m very happy then I’m going to be depressed. And vice-versa of course. It’s like that story about the present given to a king that would make him happy when sad and sad when happy: a ring engraved with the words, ‘This too shall pass.’ Ah, now I’m even boring myself. One thing though: as with all introspection, is all of what I just said basically bollocks? Will I look at it tomorrow and wonder why I thought any of it was even remotely true? Yes, yes I will.

But I shall go to bed happy: tomorrow is sunday roast day and that is awesome. I plan to eat a lot, which I only seem to be able to do with sunday roast any more since I got back from Leeds. That sucks. Eating lots is a talent I take great enjoyment from.

I really have no idea how to manage this blog.